Several months ago, I joined a local chapter of a nursing organization called the Nurses Christian Fellowship (NCF). NCF supports Christian nurses from young to old, offering mentoring, prayer, and fellowship for student nurses, as well as education and community for nurses at all places in their careers. In my enthusiasm to network and connect with older nurses, some of whom might have some experience with health ministry and faith community nursing, I committed to three years of membership and joined in on a zoom session with an Illinois chapter ASAP.
I was surprised to see that the group was relatively small, around 4 people per session. They meet every other month on either a Wednesday evening or Saturday morning, and they go over what are known as “soft skills” in nursing. Technical skills like putting in an IV, Foley, or doing an effective physical assessment are pretty straightforward; they involve classes, practice, and, sometimes, the use of models and dummies to figure them out. Soft skills, however, are a little harder to define. They include things like effective communication, compassion, work ethic, and time management, which is really useful to anyone.
During the most recent meeting, the topic was “Teach Back: A method of Confirming Understanding.” Teach back is something most nurses learn about in nursing school, and I underestimated how important this would be. It’s a method of teaching and communication where the learner demonstrates their understanding of the material taught. So much of my job is teaching patients in order to help them become better advocates for themselves. The directors of this group have a gift for seeing these skills in the light of scripture and pulling the motivation behind learning them from a Christ-centered lens.
The main thing that strikes me during each of these meetings is how well these experienced nurses tie together what it looks like to live out the gospel in a professional setting. In the middle of the most recent session, two members of the group used the example of insulin administration teaching to show what it might look like to have an effective teaching session, then the two remaining members of the group commented on what went well and what could be improved. In this short example, we were able to point out things like what fruits of the Spirit, as mentioned in Galatians, might be utilized here.
But the Holy spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things!
Much of the teaching session spoke to a concept that I think is hard for busy nurses, and really for busy people in general. In order to do effective teaching, regardless of how busy things might feel, being fully present during a teaching session must become a regular discipline. That doesn’t mean eschewing all responsibilities in order to get one thing done. But it does mean intentionally peeling ourselves away from distraction in order to be wholly engaged. This isn’t just for the sake of making a patient comfortable or helping them to feel supported, although these are definitely super important. For the Nurse who follows Jesus, being fully present with a patient means seeing them as Christ sees them and engaging them the way he has engaged with us. We are called to model Christ and be His tangible hands, feet, and voices on earth.
This reminded me of two books I read some years ago. The first is one called Practicing the Presence of People by Mike Mason. The other, which I read some years later, is called The Practice of the Presence of God by Brother Lawrence. I’ve reread some sections of these books after attending the session on teach back to review the content. The first is similar to a devotional; short chapters, reflecting on what it means to be fully present with other human beings, who are a reflection of a Creator God. The second is basically a collection of letters written by Brother Lawrence, which include his meditations on what it means to live constantly present with God.
Both of these, in having to do with Presence, in addition to the NCF meeting, have challenged me to try a few things as I walk through the rhythm of my day.
1. Reach out to God regularly throughout the day.
The easiest way I could illustrate this is to tie it to romantic or familial relationships. There are times when I’m in the car or going on walks with my husband that I will sometimes reach out and take hold of his hand. There are no demands, no questions, just an acknowledgment of presence, of my wanting to be physically connected to his, and vice versa.
Similarly, I spent a good portion of this week trying to pull myself toward God, whatever the moment I found myself in. Not always necessarily with questions, complaints, or words, but reaching with whatever “self” I could push in that direction in order to stay connected. I have to admit, this was a difficult exercise. The point isn’t to distract myself, but to acknowledge God’s presence no matter the situation. And it’s not like he’s in a certain fixed area at all times. He’s just… there.
In the preface to his letters, Father Beaufort, who was the recipient of Brother Lawrence’s letters, writes something that brought me a lot of comfort as I tried my hand at this kind of meditation of God’s presence:
That when sometimes [Brother Lawrence] had not thought of God for a good while, he did not disquiet himself for it; but after having acknowledged his wretchedness to God, he returned to him with so much the greater trust in Him, as he had found himself wretched through forgetting him. That the trust we put in God honors him much, and draws down great graces.
This wasn’t an exercise meant for me to condemn my failures. It was an exercise in trust. It was a reaching out to God in all moments of my life and my day in order to stay connected to His rhythms, to see if there was anything in those moments he had for me to pay attention to. It requires a reliance on grace in order not to condemn myself when I fail in this endeavor. It was a constant, quiet way of standing in wonder at a God who is ever present with me, even when I was not with him.
I’m not sure how long I’ll remain cognizant enough to keep this up, but I’m hopeful that this will be something I could continue to be reminded of and utilize regularly. I have found that in difficult moments with others and with patients, I’ve been surprised by the steadiness this brought me. I’m always skeptical of exercises like this becoming methods of falsely elevating or downplaying emotions. However, the fact that I have acknowledged the creator of the universe, who is more able than I to deal with the difficulties, gave me a sense of security, not in my own ability, but in his ability to do more than I could at that moment.
2. Pay attention to moments that I could be more “present” to the people around me.
This is actually a pretty broad statement, so I’m going to break it down to certain areas of my life.
Family: Put down my phone during and after dinner time.
My mind is constantly linked to my phone. I check it neurotically for texts, emails, and ways to numb myself to the world (Tik Tok being my anesthesia of choice). It not only makes it hard for me to actively pay attention to what’s going on around me, it also makes me frustrated or even angry when I don’t get a few minutes to check it. There is a constant battle for my attention, and although my family should win out, the habit of picking up my phone during our times together means they end up losing me for significant moments.
Work: Find one or two moments a week to do a fully present teach-back session with a patient.
Recently, I’ve found myself feeling purposeless and, honestly, just annoyed at work. My patients are great, my work is meaningful and good, and my coworkers are really stellar people. But I think I’m suffering from a combination of Covid-related burnout and restlessness from my own lack of efficiency.
The NCF session brought together faith and work in a way that I haven’t done regularly for myself in a while. One of the things that pulled me toward Nursing was how tangibly nurses could show the love, care, and sacrifice Jesus demonstrates through scripture. The day to day humdrum of life sometimes drowns out how astounding it is that I am able to demonstrate that kind of care to other people. Admittedly, I can’t quite work miracles of healing like he did, but I’ve learned over the years how significant small things can be for people.
A few things I think might help in my engagement with patients regarding this particular soft skill in nursing is making sure to stop and ask patients to reiterate their understanding of the material and, if they are learning a new skill, having them demonstrate the skill to me before they leave. This also might mean discharging them with things like written instructions with what to do over the next weeks (sometimes, there’s more info than anyone could really memorize!) and having a database of videos, pictures, or other resources patients can use to review what they’ve learned if they’re not sure of what to do.
These are the two areas of life I’ll focus on for now, but there are so many others; friends, church, even my own self, like when doing errands or chores. For those reading this blog, what are ways you have practiced “presence”? That is, what are areas in your life where you have tried to engage yourself more fully, and how did it turn out? Feel free to leave a comment down below!
Your blog prompted me to stop and examine my time in the presence of God. For me, one way that I practice, “presence” is through the CLN, Inc meetings. The meetings are scheduled every other month, but I think, plan and pray about these meetings every month throughout the year. As you shared in your blog, God shows up in a special way during these meetings. Because you wrote about NCF and CLN, Inc in your blog, I’m feeling good about this way of practicing God’s presence. Thank you for sharing your practice being present with God. It’s a really good read and a source of personal encouragement for CLN, Inc.
Nell, I’m so surprised you found me here and I realized a little surprised at myself at the fact that I wrote about CLN and never told any of you about it! You all have been such a blessing to me. I’m so glad you found this post encouraging in any way, and I’ll look forward to seeing you soon!